I have an idea: let’s get drunk and complicate our “just friends” relationship.

A friend of mine from HS told me when he was drunk, that he had a crush on me through HS. I just can’t believe this, mainly because of the shit show I was in HS. He was always very nice to me, and his friends have remained very nice to me and stayed in touch. My question is why it would occur to him to share this with me now?

I really thought it was just a drunk ploy, something that a guy would say. But he has continued to call/text me and when we talk I feel totally at ease and calm. I just can’t believe this, mainly because of the shit show I was in HS. He was always very nice to me, and his friends have remained very nice to me and stayed in touch. I have no idea why I didn’t know about this crush, I thought I was at least in tune with people who liked me.

Still shocked, and trying to figure out how I missed this, I called my B.F.F. (our relationship also began in HS) explained what happened and asked her what she knew about this. She confirmed his crush and went further to state “did you really not know, I mean you couldn’t tell? He would always try to talk to you, and was always super nice to you.”

I had no idea! I mean, how could I have even known? I didn’t think he even really knew who I was; we didn’t hang out in the same group, but really just bumped into each other when our friends co-mingled. I just didn’t think he thought of me as anything other than the party girl. Where did this even come from?

Are things too different in our “just friends” lives for us to make something work, or is this something that should be complicated for a good reason?  He is a great guy; I would totally love to have him as a Valentine’s Day date and what I remember he has always been the better of the guys I knew back then. Damn, now I have a crush on someone that I should be “just friends” with. What to do?

That super awkward moment when you are in the elevator with a co-worker that you have no socially appropriate thoughts. No I don’t mean sexual, I am talking about how you only are thinking about the work that you have to do with them, or the last meeting you have together and then you end up asking about the weather.

Yes the “it is so warm out” or “wow it is crazy cold today, right?” Yeah that conversation. Then the conversation leads into the work-life because that is really all you know about that person. What is with our need to make small talk about something other than work, these are work people, and shouldn’t that be enough? I mean, these really aren’t REAL people they are WORK people, why do we care about their lives outside of the office if we never see them anywhere but in the office?

This morning when I was riding up I tried to avoid getting into the elevator with someone I know from meetings that works on my floor. It’s not that I don’t like this person; it is that I am just not really in the mood to make small talk first thing in the morning. I don’t really care how her commute is, nor how the weather is, nor where her family is this morning. Actually the only thing I care to know is how she wears those killer heals every morning, but that is not really appropriate conversation for the morning elevator ride. I just ended up smiling at her and left my head phones in. I suppose that is why she felt the need to initiate needless elevator conversation about the weather.
“It’s really warm out” she states.
“Yeah, no kidding, its crazy weather right now. Totally not normal for the season” I reply. Man, she started it. Damn It! Who is stopping before our floor? I have to get out of this elevator!
“That’s why I am not wearing a coat” she points out. I don’t care, I didn’t even notice.
I smile “I am too lazy to find my other coats.” DING! Finally we reach our floor, now for the awkward good bye. “Well, enjoy your day!” Mad dash to my cube!

Or maybe it is just me, am I the awkward person that feels the need to make small talk in elevators? Or am I the only one that feels they are awkward?

-Curly

Were you spotted by our Barlife photographers over the Christmas break. Did you get snapped? Check out our January issue Barfly galleries.

Apartment, Chicago

Cadillac Ranch, Bartlett

Nikki, Chicago

Cadillac Ranch, Bartlett

Drink, Schaumburg

Spy Bar, Chicago

Snuggery, Chicago

Fitzs Spare Keys, Elmhurst

Broken your New Year resolution already? Nevermind, just check out our Sexy Server gallery instead! Want to nominate a sexy server you know to appear in a future issue? Send us an email with their name and the bar they work at.

Elvis Aaron Presley born January 8, 1935 was a legend. Beyond legend, he was The King. His sudden passing in 1977 from cardiac arrest brought world-wide hysteria. Thousands of people converged on Graceland. 300 National Guardsmen were called in to maintain order. Flags in Memphis were flown at half-staff until The King’s funeral. Despite a considerable number of people alleging to have seen Elvis since his death and one website that even claims he is working as an undercover agent for the DEA, The King is peacefully resting in the Meditation Garden the now nationally recognized historic landmark of Graceland.

Being the iconic entertainer that he was, it was no surprise that others would begin to impersonate The King. The first Elvis impersonator was a 16 year old boy named Jim Smith who would jump on stage and imitate Presley’s mannerisms. Although he could not sing or play guitar, Smith was featured several times on a Canadian TV show and earned his own fame. Impersonating Elvis became popular in the mainstream after the death of The King and can be called a special branch of the entertainment industry. Contests, festivals, books, films, television, plays, and just about every wedding chapel in Vegas have paid tribute to this phenomenon.

One such individual is Chicago’s own Rick Saucedo. Having begun his career of impersonating Elvis with the band The Ambassadors at the young age of seventeen in 1972, many local clubs and lounges took notice of the young man. As the years progressed, Rick was approached by larger venues and talents. He opened for The Monkees at the Chicago Theater and toured with his tribute act. Following the passing of Elvis, Rick was asked to star in the Broadway play, “The Legend Lives On” in 1978. Dedicated to his craft, Rick performed six nights a week for five months, never using a stand in. A year later, Rick took the show on the road and played the Stardust in Las Vegas. Another incarnation of The King presented itself in the title role of the 1979 film, Elvis. Rick, being a true tribute artist, was ready to show the world everything he had. Unfortunately, Hollywood had other plans: Rick was told another performer would sing the vocals while Rick would lip sync, and do the speaking and acting. Rick declined feeling this was too constricting and would not be a fair demonstration or performance. Kurt Russell would go on to take the role.

By the 1980’s, Rick had released two albums and was ready to expand his talents. He joined the band Redwing performing classics from John Lennon, Paul McCartney, Eric Clapton, Queen, and of course, Elvis. After Redwing, Rick joined with Johnny Starr and The Meteors paying tribute to the earlier years of Elvis. Another film role was offered to Rick, and this time he took it. Starring with Jeremy Piven, John Cusack and Mike Myers in Elvis Stories (written and directed by Ben Stiller), the entertainer was given the chance to loosen up a little and have fun with the tribute.

The 90’s reunited Rick with The Ambassadors, had him powering the long-running Elvis Birthday Tribute Spectacular at the Star Plaza Theatre in Indiana, and allowed him to perform as a solo act in Aruba. Upon his return home to the states, Rick hit the album charts in 1999. Writing and releasing his greatest original achievement, “Memphis, I’m Coming Home”, brought balance to Rick’s entire career, successfully merging the style of Elvis with something entirely new and original. The album hit shelves in music stores and the promotional tour began.

Throughout the 2000′s, Rick reinvented himself again – making changes in his production style, lifestyle, entourage, bands of choice, and musical selection. Most importantly, Rick launched in cyberspace. Live footage made its way on to YouTube, his official MySpace page was created, he joined Facebook, and launched his first online radio program, entitled Heartbeat Radio. For some, this was the first time people all over the world could see and hear Rick perform. This has opened up a whole new fan base to Rick.

Currently Rick plays with The Ambassadors and Change of Habit when not performing solo. He attributes his dedication and perfectionism to his lifetime success. Rick strives to keep each show fresh and exciting despite the fact that he has been in the business for four decades.

Rick Saucedo has broken venue attendance records, graced television and movie screens, recorded over fifty original songs, received awards, and served as an inspiration to up-and-coming Elvis impersonators. He has truly dedicated his life to not only the impression of Elvis, but a full embodiment of The King. In August 2011, Rick was honored as the first inductee into the Elvis Tribute Artist Hall of Fame.

You can catch Rick Saucedo live in The Elvis Tribute Artist Spectacular, the longest running birthday tribute show, celebrating the 77^th birthday of Elvis. Tickets are available online through www.ricksaucedo.com or by calling theatre box offices.

Thursday, January 5^th – North Shore Center for the Performing Arts in Skokie, IL
Friday, January 6^th – Paramount Theatre in Aurora, IL
Saturday, January 7^th – Star Plaza Theatre in Merrillville, IN

Over three years have passed since the UFC came to Chicago back in October of 2008 for UFC 90. Since then, many fans have been clamoring and wondering when the Ultimate Fighting Championship would make it’s return to the Windy City.

Thankfully, we don’t have to wait much longer. On Wednesday, December 7th, Dana White held a press conference at the United Center to announce the massive triple header for UFC on Fox 2 which will be taking place on Saturday, January 28.

Alongside Dana White were the six fighters who will be taking part in the headlining portion of the card including Michael Bisping, Demian Maia, Chael Sonnen, Mark Munoz, Phil Davis and Rashad Evans. All three fights have major importance in their respective divisions.

The main event will feature a light heavyweight number one contender matchup between Rashad Evans and Phil Davis. Evans has been the number one contender for the belt for a long time, but due to injuries has had to take other fights instead. Now standing in his way is NCAA Division 1 All American wrestler Phil Davis.

Davis has been unstoppable in his mixed martial arts career, amassing an impressive 9-0 record with notable wins in the UFC over Brian Stann, Tim Boetsch, Antonio Nogueria (Lil Nog). At UFC 123 Davis used an impressive modified kimura to submit Boetsch, which Joe Rogan dubbed the Mr. Wonderful.

Evans meanwhile made quick work of a very late replacement in Tito Ortiz. Evans with over a year off from the cage looked better than ever as he picked Ortiz apart in every aspect of the game. By the end of the second round it was just too much for Ortiz and the ref had to stop the fight.

The winner of this contest is slated to face current UFC light heavyweight champion Jon Jones at a future date.

In another number one contender’s matchup, Chael Sonnen takes on Mark Munoz in the co-main event of the night. Sonnen took on current middleweight champion Anderson Silva at UFC 117 and was winning the fight until he got caught in a triangle with just two minutes left in the fight. He rebounded with a victory over Brian Stann and immediately called Anderson Silva out.

Of course, Munoz wants his crack at the champion as well and is making a case for himself. He has put together a four-fight win streak with wins over Aaron Simpson, CB Dollaway, Demian Maia and Chris Leben. Both Munoz and Sonnen have phenomenal wrestling abilities and this fight could showcase their vicious ground and pound and aggressive jiu jitsu skills.

The third fight that is headline worthy features Michael Bisping taking on former title challenger Demian Maia. This bout is to determine who the next challenger will be behind Sonnen-Munoz or can provide a replacement should one of those two get injured.

Bisping recently fought Jason Miller at The Ultimate Fighter 14 finale, making Miller look like he had no business inside the octagon. Bisping weathered a storm early in the first round, and after that it was all Bisping. Miller tried to taunt Bisping by putting his hands down and let Bisping punch him in the face, and even though Bisping didn’t knock Miller out, Miller’s face was rearranged. Bisping, like Munoz, has put together a four fight win streak, finishing his last two opponents.

Maia, an accomplished Brazilian Jiu Jitsu fighter, is seeking revenge for his loss to Anderson Silva back at UFC 112. Maia has since gone 3-1 with his lone loss coming at the hands of Mark Munoz.

UFC on Fox will be taking place on Saturday, January 28 at the United Center in downtown Chicago. Tickets are on sale now and range in price from $40-$250.

Brent Todd owns and writes for MMARecap.com the leading mixed martial arts website in the greater Chicagoland area. Find them on Facebook at facebook.com/mmarecap and on twitter @1outmma. Photos provided by Stan Balazia of Cage Fanatic

Name: DJ LORi   (Lori Lucas-Martinez)

Club: Continuing guest spots all over the Midwest, including a residency of 4 years at Martinis-In-Valpo (Valparaiso, IN) and Murphy’s and 2nd Cousins (Rockford, IL)

Years DJing: 26 years and no intention of stopping! (Since 1985)

Favorite download site: Beatport for Electro & Progressive House. Crooklyn Clan & Crack4DJs for Top40 & Hip-hop Mashups

Favorite all time songs: Medina: You and I and La Fuente Bang Bang

Why did you become a DJ:  As the perpetual tomboy and entrepreneur that I am, besides the love for House music that was evolving from Chicago back in 1985, I saw a market for female DJs. It was also great for social networking, plus I wanted to step out of being just another face in the crowd.  I was lured by the creativity, skills and fun of being a DJ and wanted to represent as a House female DJ solid. Naturally said, I felt it was my calling and I’ve not looked back since then

What don’t people know about you:  Most people don’t know I have a 65% hearing loss from birth.  When I’m asked if I have trouble hearing the music when I DJ I simply respond that the music in the clubs is played loudly and people naturally talk much louder as well, so I do not have to strain to hear them or the music.  I have found the perfect job for me

Brainchild of the band’s manager Roger Jansen of KMA Management, The Hot Sauce Committee is a collection of musicians who have recently come together for the sole purpose of making you dance your ass off! Playing 90’s hip hop and rocking old school rhymes is what they do best. You don’t often hear tunes from The Beastie Boys, Young MC, Run DMC, Digital Underground, and Tone Loc from a cover band. Aptly named after the intended two-part Beastie Boys album release of the same name, The Hot Sauce Committee not only pays tribute to these iconic hip hop moguls, but they do it while having a good time. The audience can’t help but get do the Humpty Hump or Bust a Move with these guys!

While the band and its concept are new to the local music scene, its members are not. Front Man Serv is well known in the Chicago area and rocks a mic like nobody’s business. On guitar and vocals, Bender’s established reputation through alternative/heavy rock bands like The Branded and A Birdsong Valentine make him the man with the plan. DJ Volley’s vocals and skills behind the turntable bring everything together, and Pauly C’s drum beats are the driving force behind the previously mentioned “ass-off dancing”.

Ripping up the stage with their rock rap style delivery, the guys suit up to deliver tunes from House of Pain, Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, Rage Against the Machine, Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park, and Red Hot Chili Peppers to round out the set list. The band has yet to start the process of writing their own music, but they do see it as a possibility in the future. “Eventually once we get our name out there, we will start writing originals,” said Serv. “Until then we’ll continue to rock the 90’s hip hop!”

The Hot Sauce Committee has entered the scene with a bang rocking The Elbo Room for Halloween and sharing the stage with Wedding Banned for Black Wednesday at Durty Nellie’s in Palatine. Now they play every Thursday night as the resident band at Durty Nellie’s. When asked who their target audience is, Bender responded,

“Anyone who likes to party and get down! HEY LA-DIES?!?!”

With hip hop being the best-selling music genre of the mid 1990s and adding flavor to many American pop songs by the end of the century, the fan base is surely out there. The Hot Sauce Committee has devoted themselves to the style and culture promising a night full of Hot Dog Flavored Water, Fresh Kicks, Monkeys made of Brass, and GIRLS (which coincidentally enough are listed among the band’s interests on Facebook)!

With goals to spread their sauce across the country and hopefully the world, the group is willing to travel anywhere a van and trailer can take them. Check them out online at www.thehotsaucecommittee.net.

Jordan

Bar:  Tree Guys Pizza & Pub, Itasca

Hometown: Palatine

Hobbies: Boys, shopping, drinking, going out with friends.

Favorite Drink: Belvedere & Soda

Worst pick up line you’ve ever heard:  “I just moved you to the top of my 2 Do List”

Craziest thing that happened behind the bar:  I’ll never tell!

Favorite song: Jay Z & Kanye  “N***as in Paris”

Turn offs: No car, No job, lives with Mom.

 Turn ons:Tall, funny, cute, nice teeth with a job

Mariya Land

Bar:  John Barleycorn, Schaumburg

Hometown: Barrington Hills

Hobbies: Hanging out with my family and friends, being with my animals and working out.

Favorite Drink: 4 Rebels Dragonade (4 Rebels Premium Vodka with lemonade and a splash of soda)

Worst pick up line you’ve ever heard: “You want to play house? You can be the door and I’ll look forward to slamming you all night.”

Craziest thing that happened behind the bar: I saw the beginning of what I am sure ended up as a threesome. Three complete strangers met each other at the bar, moved into three-way kissing and then left together. Everyone in the bar was watching them. It was like a bad porno.

Favorite song: Bob Marley’s “Red, Red Wine”

Turn offs: metrosexual guys (aka men that spend more time in front of mirror then I do.

Turn ons: a perfect smile, someone that makes me laugh and someone that accepts my craziness for what it is.

Step right up folk, and let’s play the game of Drunk, Sober or Schizophrenic!

You would think that I am kidding, but in my experience I get to speak with all kinds of people. I feel like a lot of the positions I have held over the years trained me to now be able to distinguish between the various personality defects that others have.

I will let you in on the fun and share some experiences…

Situation #1: Woman walks into the dressing room with a large amount of clothes. Woman puts a top on as a skirt and something that resembled a see-through shirt (or at least that is what it looks like on the hanger) on over a bra-less chest. Woman needs a bra, and does not need to be proving that. Lovely. Woman decides to share her ensemble, in all seriousness, with me as a choice for a holiday outfit. I ask, Drunk, Sober or Schizophrenic?

Situation #2: Man walks into a bar… ok I am joking, we know that one will end up with a drunk. But don’t you really think that you can expect more from the man in the bar than the woman who has lost it?

Situation #3: Woman calls into work and we are going to have a conversation. After the first sentence I knew this was going to be difficult. I asked a few questions, and she responded with “I can’t answer that, I am a very important person and that is confidential.” Oh goodie! The woman then went on to have a full conversation with her-self for the next hour, while I put the phone down and did other work. I ask, Drunk, Sober or Schizophrenic?

I ask because for this New Year, I resolve to not come across as drunk nor schizophrenic to anyone that I meet. I hope to have a year full of sobers with a drunk moment sprinkled in from time to time. Have a great New Year work friends and remember to play “Drunk, Sober or Schizophrenic?” in your work scenarios.